The following occurred in a Facebook chat where my friend is talking about her husband. I didn’t not copy it word for word, I just used what I remembered. So.
“Oh, don’t worry. You’ll find Mr. Right when you get to Italy.”
“I…um…I really have no interest in ever having a relationship that has anything to do with emotional involvement. That’s what pets are for. Like dogs and turtles.”
“But you have no choice if it’s fate.”
“We choose our own fates.”
“You’ll get lonely.”
“No…I really won’t. I had the entire week off and do you know how many times I interacted with human beings? Only when forced to in order to have food.”
“I don’t like people much? They’re scary and they talk fast and I never know what to do with my face when I’m walking past someone.”
Dude. WHY is it so hard to understand that I don’t want to settle down and be married in a house with 2.5 kids and a garden (actually, I would love a garden) and a picket fence and a mortgage?
Why is it so hard to believe that I do not crave any form of constant human companionship? If I’m lonely, I knock on someone’s door or call my Mom. If I want to chill with a dude then I go find one. If I crave touch then I get it.
What I never crave is someone asking me how I’m doing and actually wanting to know. I don’t want to talk (out loud) about my feelings. Let’s play Quelf. I never crave someone chattering about their boss or their day or their bird. I’d like quiet and a book and a cuppa, thanks. I never feel the absolute need to make anyone but myself happy, or guilty if I don’t produce that happiness for them. And that may be selfish, but it’s the truth. I hate going out exploring with people because then we go where they want to go and never where I want to go. I feel guilty if I assert myself and make them follow me around to see a painting or wander through a bookstore or whatever, so instead I follow them through clothing stores and to bars and then I feel as though my time’s been wasted.
Plus, I can’t go to Mars if I’ve got someone waiting for me on Earth.